What does HUMAN mean?

"Humans are the only animals that have children on purpose, keep in touch (or don't), care about birthdays, waste and lose time, brush their teeth, feel nostalgia, scrub stains, have religions and political parties and laws, wear keepsakes, apologize years after an offense, whisper, fear themselves, interpret dreams, hide their genitalia, shave, bury time capsules, and can choose not to eat something for reasons of conscience. The justification for eating animals and for not eating them are often identical: we are not them."

-Jonathan Safran Foer, Eating Animals

More than struggling with the new diet, ever since I became vegan I struggle with my conscience. The new diet, in fact, has been quite kind to my body. I awake early in the morning feeling refreshed, I have not felt bloated at all, my skin complexion has never been better, and I generally feel like I'm floating and have more energy than before. But I am struggling a bit with my identity. Who am I now in relationship to animals?

I guess for the first time in my life, I'm asking myself, how do animals see me? How do animals see humans? They all clearly have an understanding of their relationship with us: some fear us, others desire our companionship, and yet others would like us for dinner. But what do animals make of our selective attitudes toward them and, if they could always have it their way, what would they have happen to us? If knowledge is passed from one generation to another, then they must clearly be aware of all of their ancestors we've killed en masse, how we've killed them, and that their turn is coming, too.

Sure, it's important to respect animals. But in order to be able to understand them, shouldn't I also try to understand who am I to them?
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After I finished writing this post, I thought about it constantly because it seemed like something was missing from it. It's 10:27 a.m. the next day, I just woke up, and I think I know what it's missing.


It's important for me to know who I am to animals and who they are to me because I'm afraid that the way I have treated animals my whole life, either directly (my pets) or indirectly (the meat I ate), is reflected in my relationship with the people in my life. Sounds confusing? Bear with me.
Even though I have never killed an animal per se, animals have died because of me. I am a strong believer that by doing nothing, you're still doing something. And there are unintended consequences of killing animals over and over again, for generations and thousands of years. such as transferring the feelings that come with killing into the relationships we have with other humans. What feelings come with killing? You tell me. Indifference? Self-righteousness? Cruelty? Numbness? Revenge? Violence? Denial?


Any of these sound familiar from how humans also treat each other?


At the same time, could it be possible that everything the animal experienced while dying, or in the moments prior to that, was transfered to me when I ate its meat? Fear, rejection, desperation, helplessness, sadness, betrayal, hate... any of these sound like anything you may have experienced once or twice in your life?


Now I think my blog post is complete.